Monday 30 January 2012

Fishes

I'm kind of in shock right now.
I was in school and I walked up to my friends, who were sitting on a bench, talking to a girl i'm kind-of friends with.
They told me to congratulate her.
I hugged and congratulated her, and then asked why.
My friend told me she was engaged.
I rolled my eyes, laughed, and said "Seriously, why am I congratulating her?"
They said they were serious.
I looked down at the friend we were talking about. She nodded her affirmation.
I opened and closed my mouth a few times, probably looking like a fish.

Fail fish. LOL.

Then I congratulated her again and hugged her again, because I didn't know what else to do. She didn't seem too happy about it.
She told us a funny anecdote about the ring not fitting because her hands are so tiny. Even though she had given a ring for measurement. Apparently, it was an adjustable ring, so the jeweler got the size mixed up.
I didn't ask her all of the questions racing through my head because i thought it would be awkward seeing as I don't know her that well. And since she seemed uncomfortable talking about it.

I asked my other friends later though, the ones who were sitting with her. They're really good friends with her.
Apparently, this guy lives in Scotland.
She's never met him before save one Skype "date"
She's going to have to move there. And study there.
He's twenty four. I know the age difference will seem less extreme in a few years, but right now, he's just...old.
The worst part? She doesn't want to marry him. But her family won't listen to her.

(If you are a Scottish-Desi, I apologize.)

She looks so young! she looks as young as I do. I've been told I look like I'm in the ninth grade.
She's only 18. That's not old enough to get engaged! She's just a kid.
There are people in my grade who have gotten engaged at seventeen or sixteen, right after O levels. There's one girl who's married already too. I was shocked to hear about them, but this is just really different.
Because I don't know them. And because she doesn't have any say in the matter. She's just resigned to her fate. It's what's most upsetting.



8 comments:

  1. What if she just refused to marry him? You can't be forced to marry anyone in Scotland. All she has to do is phone the police when she gets there. Is she worried her family might kill her?

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    1. I think she doesn't want to disappoint her family or something like that.

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  2. Ewww. Who trusts the Internet? He could be older.

    It's so stupid how people get married so early. I know parents do it so their daughter won't lose their virginity premaritally, but seriously, their daughter's not gonna do anything funny if they don't even let her go wherever she wants half of the time. And if she does screw up, it's her fault.

    It's illegal to get married before you're 18 in the U.S., and I'm really thankful for that law now.

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    Replies
    1. haha I'm sure there's some family connection thing. They wouldn't marry her off to a complete random stranger.

      I know. But maimans and punjabis usually get their daughters married off quickly.

      haha I don't think your parents'll make you get married anytime soon, judging by your reaction. :p

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  3. That is just a tad odd. It seems strange to me, as someone who lives in a country and place like Australia, that arranged, forced marriages still exist. The whole concept just seems so 'medieval' to me. You'd think people would have woken the hell up by now.

    But maybe that's just me and people who live in countries like Australia, where arranged marriages just aren't the norm? I don't know. Either way, I have never liked the idea of arranged marriage.

    That poor girl.

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    1. I don't mind the idea of marriages being arranged, as long as both of them agree to it and like each other enough.
      I know my parents will eventually try to get me to meet a hundred nice marriagable boys, as is happening to my cousins right now, but they wouldn't ever force me to marry.
      I'll probably end up marrying one of these rishtas only, seeing as I'll never really go out and look for a boyfriend :p

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  4. She doesn't want to marry the guy?!!! Then there's NO reason she should abide to her parent's wishes. As far as the age is concerned, it's fine. I've known girls getting married at 17 and even sixteen.

    PS;- I have been away and missed A LOT of wonderful posts at your amazing blog and I feel devastation. On the brighter side, I have a five day vacation starting from today. Maybe I can use this time to make amends and read all the posts I missed. Cheers!

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    Replies
    1. yeah, but I don't think she has much of a choice does she? I mean, she obviously wouldn't run away. she loves her family.

      hahaha Hamza you're so SWEET. <3 <3
      you moved your blog, and I JUST found it. I'd been wondering where you had gone.
      You have a five day vacation? LUCKY.

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